Who Are We To Judge

July 20, 2011


I have been somewhat silent about some political issues for a while. Well, it’s long enough. Even though there are many in the community that are much more articulate than I am, here I go again, ranting about a topic that has been pulled into the political arena that is not a political issue at all. It’s not even a legal issue. It is a very personal, spiritual, ethical, and emotional issue. That is every aspect of being LGBT or Q. I have added Q because my very brilliant grand daughter explained to me that Queer is the newest term to describe anyone LGBT. I will be using Q in this article from now on for brevity’s sake.

Anyone who knows me, knows I am very far from perfect, I am usually opinionated and can be judgmental of others. I aspire to better practices and higher understanding.

It is critical, for us to listen carefully to all sides before we cast our votes, before we choose to support any group or politician.



When a politician is weak of character and has nothing real to offer the community, they may jump on a bandwagon and raise a flag of a controversial topic that many voters don’t really understand, but are very emotional and are often irrational about. Citizens may believe it is important because someone in authority “said so.” They may want to do the “right” thing and so they are willing to hurt others—even family members—to satisfy their need to be right in their own eyes and of the community.

If you don’t love yourself enough to allow others to be who they are, then look within. Find out who you are at the core and allow yourself to be acceptable. Focus your energy on loving yourself. This may call for introspection that most of us won’t allow or aren’t willing confront. It may be a fearful prospect.

There are very few moments in most of our lives when we have love—real, pure unconditional love. The type of love, when everything about a person is perfect, no matter what. Many parents experience this unconditional love when their child is born. It may be the purist love that an individual will ever experience. Unconditional love is a state that we may attain with ourselves and others—this is possible. I have had these moments.

We may have unconditional love in any relationship, such as with a brother or sister. There are no conditions placed on the love we give to the other. Then, there is the conditional love—when we say, “I’d love you if you weren’t gay.” Or, “I want you to be the way I think you should be. So I can respect and love you.”

If you don’t love yourself, there is no possibility of loving or accepting others. The only defense is to judge others—to take the focus off yourself. If we can put everyone’s attention on judging a particular individual or group, then no one is looking at us and seeing what a “bad” person we are on the inside.

Almost every human has been misled into thinking they are the only one who is unacceptable—the only one who is defective. This belief allows us to be intimidated by social practices, such as judgment of others. Quite often, this is what the political bandwagon is about. The politician is counting on drawing focus away from what they are trying to cover up about themselves. I call this “tap dancing.” It draws your attention away from the topic.

When a person says they are Christian and that makes it “right” to criticize and degrade Q’s, isn’t that contrary to their own belief system? This is the irrational behavior I was referring to above.

I learned about prejudice from my Dad. I learned about unconditional love from my Dad and Mom. It is clear; they allowed me to be perfect, most of the time. I realize, that kind of support is rare and very much needed. I learned about rejection and judgment from my peers and society.

I am not judging anyone here. I’m just sayin,’ when I see a Christian, judging and condemning another’s lifestyle or behavior’s, I see a very small child—afraid of being judged and condemned–someone who is overwhelmed by not being acceptable–I see a person that has not yet found love from within.

I see a person without their own words, who is simply regurgitating what has been fed into them all their lives. I see a person who is not in the habit of questioning everything and thinking, thinking, thinking.

When I observe a Christian judging and condemning another’s lifestyle or behavior’s, I wonder what happened between “Judge not, or Love one another,” and the unconditional love that generated us.

I am not asking you to like everyone, I am only making a request; Please, don’t hurt people I love and respect. And, please, don’t hurt yourself by judging others. You can be better than that. We can all be better than that.


My Life is Okay…

April 4, 2010

My last blog entry was months ago. Why? Who knows? Distracted, busy, overwhelmed by daily life? There could be lots of reasons, and no reason at all. It doesn’t matter, I guess. Who cares, anyway? Certainly not me.

I’m back. And, I’m on task. For the first time in many, months I have a real office and I’m settled in. That makes a difference for me. The shinny things I see out of the corner of my eye too easily distract me. So, I need a physical space without shinny stuff. A space I can control—a space where I can find myself. I feel that I have that now. Finally, all settled in.

So, I was reading Divine Caroline, when I came across the next paragraphs in a story. I liked it—it fits me some of the time:

“There are days when we feel like utter failures, when everything seems off, when we feel like hazards to the people we love. There are days when we feel we should be recalled. That some big announcement should be made alerting the world to our resident flaws, declaring that there are grave dangers inherent in our very design, that we are not fit for our particular purpose.

But then, thankfully, there are days when this seems extreme. When our imperfections are but exquisite scars earned in the game of life. When the fact that we are trying, and trying hard, counts for something. More than something. When the fact that we fumble and stumble, constantly, artfully almost, is what makes things interesting. And real. And worth it.”

By: Aidan Donnelley Rowley (View Profile)

It’s all just ego anyway. “Coulda, shoulda, woulda.” I coulda been better, I shoulda been there, I woulda said the right thing… and on and on. It’s the ego yammering in the back of my mind that loves to take my brain and soul out onto the table and play the “coulda, shoulda, woulda” game to torment me and scratch away at my confidence. Ego does not like things to be as they are. It wants us all to feel lacking and confused and feel we should be “recalled.”

It’s so very easy to be at the effect of my ego in the winter months. I don’t do well in the winter. Not well at all. I’m longing for spring.

Today is not a day that I feel like I should be recalled because of defective design. Today is a day that whatever is happening in my life is okay.

Tomorrow, my office is being moved out for a few days, so the floors can be refinished. JB


June 26, 2009

Ron Barness realizes you’re all gripped by reruns of Michael Jackson on CNN, FOX, MSNBC. Hello! Meanwhile, the world is heating up, we’re in the midst of recession, but we can make a difference if we engage our US Rep NOW before they vote on the Waxman Markey Energy Bill on Friday. It will create green/clean jobs, energy independence and reduce our country’s carbon footprint. For God’s sake people, WE can make a difference!

Craig Burton included 47 companies in the prototype version of the ChoixVert Information Card. The companies are taken from the Fortune 500 list of companies chosen by their peers as socially responsible. They have been included in the prototype version to demonstrate how the ChoixVert Information Card works.

When version 1 is published in July 2009, the data set or list of companies will be stored on the server and will update your card automatically each time the card is activated. In the prototype version, the data set is included in the card itself and will not be updated until version 1 is released.

For demonstration purposes, after you have downloaded and installed the Azigo Selector and the ChoixVert Information Card, you may search a product category for any of these companies. When you see the search results, the green ChoixVert thumbprint will display next to the appropriate companies. When you visit the company’s web site, a drop down window will appear stating the source of the data. You may select the source to see more information about the original Fortune 500 research project.

For more information on Project ChoixVert visit the new Social Web Site.

The list is divided into categories from the Fortune 500 study. The corresponding URLs will take you to the study results.

Global Most Admired

United Parcel Service http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/globalmostadmired/2008/snapshots/2071.html

Anheuser-Busch http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/globalmostadmired/2008/snapshots/35.html

General Electric http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/globalmostadmired/2008/snapshots/170.html

Bank of America http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/globalmostadmired/2008/snapshots/2580.html

Chevron http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/globalmostadmired/2008/snapshots/385.html

Procter & Gamble http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/globalmostadmired/2008/snapshots/334.html

Kroger http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/globalmostadmired/2008/snapshots/2291.html

Safeway http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/globalmostadmired/2008/snapshots/2908.html

Deere http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/globalmostadmired/2008/snapshots/128.html

Nestlé http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/globalmostadmired/2008/snapshots/6126.html

IBM http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/225.html

Computer Software Companies

Intuit http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/10960.html

Microsoft http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/3063.html

Adobe Systems http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/10916.html

Symantec http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/11073.html

Autodesk http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/11230.html

SAP http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/11242.html

Electronic Arts http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/10792.html

Oracle http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/3057.html

CA http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/2974.html


Xerox http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/451.html

Sun Microsystems http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/881.html

Hewlett- Packard http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/206.html

Canon http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/670.html

Apple http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/292.html

NCR http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/6818.html

Dell http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/1053.html

Pitney Bowes http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/330.html

Palm http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/11020.html

Computer Peripherals

Network Appliance http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/11174.html

EMC http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/5000.html

Seagate Technology http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/823.html

Scotts Technology http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/823.html

Lexmark http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/10378.html

Imation http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/10483.html

Western Digital http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/883.html

ViewSonic http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/11363.html

Network Communications

Corning http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/114.html

Harris http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/198.html

Motorola http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/288.html

Cisco Systems http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/5009.html

Qualcomm Communications http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/10570.html

Juniper Networks http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/11209.html

Tellabs http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/10496.html

Avaya http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/10864.html

Andrew http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/11178.html

CommScope http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/mostadmired/2008/snapshots/10559.html

Food and Drug Stores

Whole Foods Market

Publix Super Markets



Delhaize Group Brussels



Royal Ahold Amsterdam

Longs Drug Stores

Rite Aid


Winn-Dixie Stores

What is Steele hiding? Or, is he simply pointing to another subject to take Republicans’ minds off the fact that he RNC is completely out of touch with reality. The reality of what’s really worth our attention.

Just like Gingrich accusing Pelosi to take the focus off the torture perpetrators, Steele is trying to confuse republican voters by talking about how it will hurt everyone financially if we allow gay marriage. His words don’t even make sense. He needs some coaching to make his argument stronger. He needs better PR advice. He actually sounds deranged, even incoherent.

How can gay marriage cost taxpayers or small business. Am I  naive?  I don’t get it. Wouldn’t it be more sound business practice to have employees that are settled, secure, more socially confident. Wouldn’t employees be able to focus more easily on their jobs if they were married and had family benefits.

What might change if instead of campaigning for gay marriage, the entire community of those advocates could be freed up to advocate for saving Darfur, or education, or feeding the hungry?

Right now, instead of writing this blog, I might be working on educating children or I could be spending my energy advocating for a greener planet!!!

Note to RNC: Take the money being spent on these diversionary tactics and feed the children. JB

(CNN) 5/6/09Same-sex marriage became legal in Maine on Wednesday as Gov. John Baldacci signed a bill less than an hour after the state legislature approved it.

Maine Gov. John Baldacci signed a bill Wednesday legalizing same-sex marriage.

Maine Gov. John Baldacci signed a bill Wednesday legalizing same-sex marriage.

"I have come to believe that this is a question of fairness and of equal protection under the law and that a civil union is not equal to civil marriage," said Baldacci, a Democrat.

But he raised the possibility that the residents of the state would overturn the law, saying, "Just as the Maine Constitution demands that all people are treated equally under the law, it also guarantees that the ultimate political power in the State belongs to the people."

Three other states — Massachusetts, Connecticut and Iowa — allow same-sex marriages. Vermont has passed a law making gay and lesbian marriages legal that takes effect in September. New Hampshire lawmakers are close to passing a similar bill.

On Tuesday, the Washington City Council voted to recognize same-sex marriages from states that allow those unions. Mayor Adrian Fenty has indicated that he will sign the measure. It will become law if Congress fails to overturn the measure during a 30-day review period.

A slim majority of Americans are against legal recognition for same-sex marriage, CNN polling found last month.

Fifty-four percent of adults questioned in an April 23-26 nationwide CNN/Opinion Research Corp. poll said that marriages between gay or lesbian couples should not be recognized as valid, while 44 percent said they should be considered legal.

The survey’s sampling error was plus or minus 3 percentage points.

Fresh Expressions…

April 29, 2009

Jodi just posted stunning new original art pieces

Her new blog is worth a visit; http://iamblossoming.wordpress.com